My wife says I’m a confident person and most days that’s true.
But to leave it at “I’m confident” would only tell half the story and create an inaccurate picture.
Am I confident in my own experience and abilities? To a reasonable degree, sure, yeah. But I have to say, the bulk of my confidence comes from outside of me.
- Because of God, I’m confident that I’m fully accepted, no matter what.
- Because of my family, I’m confident that I’m fully loved, win or lose.
- Because of my friends, I’m confident that all the encouragement I’ll ever need is always within arm’s reach.
- Because of my colleagues (either my filming crew when I’m directing or my team at Key Life), I’m confident that while I don’t have all the answers, we do. Or at least, we’ll find them together.
Confidence Is Best When It’s Shared
Now these first three points are self-explanatory, but this last one merits a little more exploration…
One of my dearest friends, Carl, is currently running for a city commissioner position with the slogan ‘People Matter.’ I love that phrase. Honestly, I wish I had thought it up. As Carl explains it, no one person – including him – has all the answers. How freeing is that – that we need ALL of us. Is this just touchy-feely fuzziness? No, it’s pure strategy for this reason…
When we say ‘no’ to being defensive or territorial, we invite the wisdom of others, including those with different opinions and experiences than our own. Now our confidence can be a shared confidence. Click To TweetBut it gets better.
Confidence and… Darth Vader?
Author and speaker Jay Acunzo recently detailed a fascinating story behind the development of Darth Vader…
“[Darth Vader’s signature mask and breathing] was added mid-process. The work was well underway. George Lucas knew he wanted a “dark guy in a black cape with a big helmet” look to the villain of Star Wars. Illustrator Ralph McQuarrie suggested to Lucas that Vader should be in a space suit since he had to survive in a vacuum. Lucas said, “Okay, give him some sort of breathing apparatus.” McQuarrie then put a mask on Vader.”
– Jay Acunzo
As Acunzo concludes, “Ideas don’t happen first. They happen throughout.” Meaning this: having a shared confidence is great, but it extends even further – even if we don’t have the answers here and now, we can have the confidence that we’ll find the answers ‘out there’ — in the field, in the trenches, while we’re in-process. Strategy may happen in the boardroom, but the true breakthroughs happen on the frontline. Put another way, a winning game may start in the locker room, but you’ll never see whiteboard X’s and O’s on a highlight reel, only what happens in the thick of it, in the muddy rough and tumble of the contest. Trust in those around you is what helps make it happen.
So, am I confident? Yes. I really am.
I hope you are, too.
– Matthew Porter
Matthew Porter writes about decoding success, creative leadership, marketing, and productivity.
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