Posts Tagged ‘God’

If you haven’t heard of them, ChaCha and KGB are online answer services. You type or text a question and, moments later, your answer arrives (free for the former, 99 cents a throw for the latter).

Apparently these services are for folks who have either never heard of Wikipedia or suffer from the rare-yet-crippling affliction known as ‘Google-phobia.’

Nevertheless, putting my skepticism aside, I decided to road test ChaCha and KGB. Who knows… if the services really can deliver, maybe I could use them to handle my day-to-day decisions, similar to the way Esquire Magazine’s A.J. Jacobs outsourced his life.

ChaCha promises ‘real people answering your questions!’ And you know a brand means business when they throw an exclamation point into their tagline.

While it was tempting to take a comedic approach (‘what number am I thinking of?’), I decided I’d rather push the service’s capabilities by asking a question with an answer that is both indisputable and unGoogle-able (well, at least it was unGoogle-able until this article posted):

“What is the 35th word in Chapter 1 of Ernest Hemingway’s A Farewell To Arms?”

(answer: ‘pebbles’)

ChaCha’s answer? Four Google ads plus a video commercial for Folger’s Coffee. So either ChaCha answered my question with completely meta Mr. Miyagi-esque riddle or we experienced a ChaCha fail.

(answer: ‘ChaCha fail’)

So, on to KGB…

KGB is an automated answering service that promises I’ll ‘get answers, not links.’ So to test its answer-finding prowess, I decided to toss it a softball:

“How can God be good if He allows suffering?”

Wait, did I say ‘softball’? I meant to say ‘I’m paying ninety-nine cents, so I want my money’s worth.’

I entered my question online, then promptly got a text acknowledging my query. To proceed, it stated, I needed to text back ‘YES.’ I complied and moments later I got another message: ‘Thanks and sit tight. kgb is researching your answer and will send it shortly.’

No more than a minute later, I get the following answer to my query:

“God is fair, but life sometimes isn’t. God is good, but people often do bad things. God is perfect, but we make mistakes that sometimes cost us dearly.”

Wow. Just… wow. I’m not going to say they already had that answer in their back pocket, but they already had that answer in their back pocket. And what’s more, it’s not bad. Doctrinally, it holds up. Plus, the English Lit part of my brain (and granted, that’s a tiny section) digs the couplet structure of the answer.

Advantage: KGB.

Oh, and just to be completely scientific, I sent my Hemingway question to KGB. Less than fifteen minutes later, I got this response:

“Pebbles” is the 35th word in Chapter 1 of Hemingway’s “A Farewell To Arms.” “Swiftly” is #50.”

Bottomline on the ChaCha vs. KGB question: you get what you pay for. ChaCha proved to be an unamusing waste of time while KGB delivered (then overdelivered) on theological and literary hardballs.

My findings– which I fully expect to be published in some kind of scholarly journal– proved KGB is top dog. But exactly how good is it? Think you can give it a challenge? Hit ‘reply’ now and leave your toughest yet find-out-able (man, I am just making up words all over the place here) question. I’ll pick the best one, send it to KGB, and bring back the results.

- Matthew Porter

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The Etcetera crew was back in the studio today and the buffoonery was in full effect. Actually, amidst the comedy, we did delve into some deeper discussions. But eventually we circled back around for some more 4th grade humor.

Honestly, what other program can give you thoughtful discussions about God and poopy jokes? Not many, friend. Not many.

Click here now to get a fresh dose of your Etcetera meds (either streaming or via free MP3 download) and be sure to leave us your thoughts on today’s show.

- Matthew Porter

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A Great Quote Monday two-fer, in honor of Valentine’s Day…

“God is love.”
- I John 4:16b

“Love is all you need.”
- John Lennon

- Matthew Porter

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